Well...I was thinking. In my first few blogs I just spilled my guts and shared some of weaknesses and the challenges I've overcome. What about me though...who am I? Here's an introduction.
I grew up on Long Island, NY. At the age of 30 I still lived at home with my parents
My Sisters and brothers already moved out and were married with children
My biggest responsibility was my car,
My parents were in no rush to see me go; they never asked me to leave or even hinted at it. I only paid $25 rent a week to my dad…I would love to have that now!
A friend of mine’s parents were moving to Florida. She had an opportunity to rent a house at a great price so she asked me if I wanted to room with her so I figured I’d give it a shot. The move only lasted a few months; I moved back home…it was wonderful! I missed my mom and dad so much.
Living at home for so long, I often thought about how my life would end up. I thought I was destined to live at home and never find love. I was preparing to be a “cat lady”; which would not work for me since I’m allergic to cats.
The company I work for was moving to Charleston. They offered me a position there so I figured, once again, I would give it a shot. I had nothing to lose; my parents would welcome me back home if it didn’t work out. So, In 1996 I moved to Charleston.
It was a HUGE risk…but only in my mind
When arrived in Charleston I went out with friends from work who moved from NY. We all went to a bar to watch a hockey game. This was the first time I officially met TJ. TJ worked at the same place I did and moved from NY as well. I knew of him but never formally met him.
Something odd about him that grabbed me, but I ignored it. We New Yorkers got together some more and TJ and I were able to get to know each other better.
One day while walking through the Receiving Department at work TJ looked at me and asked if I dressed up just for him. I’m not sure why, but that’s when that something about him grabbed me again and I couldn’t ignore it.
Soon after dating, like 6 weeks soon, we became engaged. Most thought we were crazy, some actually told us that!
The night of our engagement was beautiful. It was my 31st birthday. We took a walk in downtown Charleston and ended up by the pineapple fountain. We walked up the stairs to the fountain and sat down for a while. We were walking down from the fountain admiring the stars. I learned a great lesson that night! Never walk and look up at the same time because steps are never far away! Down I went…ouch!
We were planning our wedding! One day we had an appointment with someone to make our invitations for our wedding. We were early so we decided to look at the model homes in the sub division. We walked into this one house that was just perfect for us.
So being the spontaneous couple we were we decided to have one built.
We married in September of 1998. It was a beautiful wedding. A typical Italian NY style wedding. Yikes…the cost of that wedding could have made a huge down payment on that house we were having built. If I could do that part all over again, I would.
Soon after we married, like 6 weeks soon, we found out we were pregnant.
What a wonderful day that was. Little did we know there would be two more days just like that in the near future.
Our house was ready for us in February of 1999. We moved in with lots of help from our friends from work. We were so appreciative to them for helping. We even appreciated the person who trip going up the stairs and put our first hole in our wall…what a memory. Carmie, a great friend of ours, who I had shared an apartment with since our move to Charleston, was moving in with us. She also worked with us.
The first room we focused on was the nursery for our first little guy who was to make his appearance in July. I was so excited!
We all went to a birthing class, TJ, Carmie and I. Other members of our class looked at us kind of odd at first. We all agreed that they thought either Carmie was going to be our Au Pair or she and I were partners and TJ was fathering the child.
Finally Nicholas was here. We could barely see him when he was born because our eyes were flooded with tears of Joy. He was so precious. Home we went…our perfect little family, Mom, Dad, baby and Carmie.
Things were going well for 2 weeks. Then Nicholas started spitting up more often and he wasn’t gaining weight. He then began throwing up and losing weight.
Attempts to change his formula were unsuccessful. The pediatrician then referred us to MUSC. At that point Nicholas was dehydrated and lethargic. When the doctor pressed down on his belly and I mean pressed down to were he through his back, Nicholas didn’t move or cry. He was diagnosed with pyloric stenosis. A condition were a muscle grows and blocks food from going into the stomach.
Needless to say I was a mess. I had to leave the examining room while they hooked him up to the IV. I stood outside the door and listened to my 28-day old baby scream when they were trying to find a vein for his IV. The nurse allowed me to use the phone to call my sister. Once I heard her voice I really lost it. She asked what was wrong and all I could say was my “baby is broken”. Clearly I don’t handle things like this well.
His surgery went great. He had a wonderful doctor. The doctor covered his tiny incision with a duck shaped bandage he made himself which of course I still have. Nick came home and things started to get back to normal.
Soon after that, like 6 weeks soon, I wasn’t feeling well. Could I be pregnant again?
Yes I was…OH MY! What a surprise. We didn’t have a chance to get used to a mortgage payment before we had one child now, we would have two and we still weren’t used to that mortgage payment.
Joe was born in June of 2000. He was so adorable. I was mostly excited to see Joe’s olive skin tone. Nick was so pal. I thought for sure this was my little Italian baby.
Was I wrong…Joe had Jaundice. So severe that he had to stay in the hospital 5 days after I left. Once his Jaundice was gone he was even more pal then Nicholas…oh well, the important thing was that he was healthy and coming home!
Once Joe was home things were great, busy but great. It was soon time for me to go back to work to regain my sanity.
About a year later, during one of our trips to NY my sister announced she was expecting. She was shocked since she thought she was done. She already had an 8 and a 9 year old.
I couldn’t help but laugh at her…we teased her all weekend. Well, what’s that saying, what goes around comes around?
Soon after that, 6 weeks soon, I wasn’t feeling very well. At this point, being the pro that I was, I was able to detect the fact that I was pregnant immediately.
During the first visit to, my OB/GYN, Dr. Weinstein explained to TJ that he would be getting a vasectomy once the baby was 6 weeks old. A New Yorker himself, he was a straight forward guy. No beating around the bush for this guy. His concern was my weight and age.
Justin was born April 2nd 2002. He was as cute and healthy. Oh and as pale as his brothers.
All of my boys are amazing. They have their struggles like any other average child. Nick and Justin have some challenges. Nick has Asperger’s Syndrome and Justin was recently diagnosed with PDD-NOS. Both conditions fall under the Autism spectrum. Despite their diagnosis, they are perfect! I wouldn’t want them any other way. They are doing great in school, participate in all kinds of activities…we are so blessed. Joe is like the town mayor. He talks to everyone, needs to be the center of attention. He is so much fun. I just adore those kids...
So what did I lose my taking a risk and moving to South Carolina? Well, I miss my mom, dad sister and brother and their families and lots of friends terribly. I still cry on holidays and birthday when we can’t be there or they can’t be here.
The real question now is what did I gain? I gained my own family, my own life, a home, dogs and new friends. I couldn’t imagine what life would be like if I didn’t move here.
I probably would still be living with mom and dad and paying $25 a week.
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