My goal: lose 125lbs by my 50th birthday which is 15 months away.
Realistic...absolutely.
Will I keep up with blog? I'm not sure. I do know that it helped me tremendously in the past. We will so how it helps going forward.
Sunday, January 4, 2015
Here I Go Again...
Starting over for all the right reasons this time. The reasons are me, my family and the long future we will have together.
Tuesday, October 29, 2013
It's Been A Long Time...
I can't even remember the last time I looked at my blog...it's been a while. So many things have changed in so many ways. Everything associated with my original journey is now non-existent. There are lots of great memories, great friendships formed, and, unfortunately, many "untruths" surfaced. But at the end of the day, I am a better person for the entire experience.
So why am I blogging today...not to complain by any means but to share the many blessings that have been dropping in front of us on, what seems to be, a regular basis. There have been so many wonderful little things that I may even forget to list them. I Praise God which each and every one of these.
Lets start with today. I had my annual MRI to check progression on my MS...Absolutely no change in my MRI at all! WOO HOO! We have been down to 1 car for months now. Although it has been an inconvenience it certainly hasn't been impossible. Our plan was to buy a used car mid November early December. Things were on track financially but as the time nears and I'm looking here and there for a car within our budget that's reliable I began thinking, "hmmm are we really going to be able to get something safe and reliable for the amount of money we have to spend?" Well, a gentleman we know approached TJ and told him he noticed he didn't have his car...then he went on to say that he just took his mother-in-laws car off the road. He asked TJ if he would be interested in it. He told TJ that he wanted to offer it to him first before he put it up for sale. Turns out the car is in our price range, it's an older model Chevy, 2001, BUT it only has 24,000 miles on. Isn't that crazy!! We are going to look at it this week and we are thrilled and beyond thankful that he thought of TJ first and approached him. Can I get an AMEN?!?
I was concerned about Justin's transition into middle school...as any mother would be. What made my concern greater was that he was going into a school he wanted nothing to do with. He so badly wanted to get into the same school Joe attends. The first 2-3 weeks was a struggle, he was not happy about the school, he hated the uniform, was up for hours doing excessive amounts of homework, etc. Now that the first 9 weeks have passed his grades are excellent, he is making friends, absolutely loves his teachers and his school. I asked him tonight to rate his school experience from 1 to 10, 10 being the highest. He responded, "Hmmmm, lets see, I give it a 9.9999999 aw heck, it's a 10!" Thank you God for that to!
Lets see...what else? Well our air broke and was out all summer. Heck, who has 5 grand sitting around to handover to get it fixed? Not us! AND after taking Dave Ramsey's Financial Peace class we are not about to charge things when we can make some temporary, much less expensive, "fixes". In this case, someone was kind enough to lend us a window unit that we put in one room and we purchased another unit for under $200; along with some fans and no blankets we were able to get through the summer comfortably. When TJ's car bit the dust we started driving to work together and sacrificing some of our extra curricular activities so whoever needed transportation most received it. There are other things regarding our faith, finances, our boys and our careers that are all contributing to our joy and excitement. Our blessings have been coming in all shapes and sizes, big and small. I am most grateful that we all are able to recognize them and thank God for the work he is doing in our lives through our friends, family, and co-workers.
Don't get me wrong, with all these blessings there are negatives; some things aren't going the way we want them to but we are so accepting of that...it's clearly because it's either not to be or not the right time. I believe a part of all this is reward for our patience, diligence, and our ability to now put our worries in God's hands.
With sharing this...It makes me want to start blogging again. I miss it...I miss sharing and the therapeutic side of it for me. As for the blog name...I just can't bring myself to change it. So, although this wide load has put on her half of what she lost, she will keep the blog name and hold onto to it with the hopes that it will live up to it's name once again.
So why am I blogging today...not to complain by any means but to share the many blessings that have been dropping in front of us on, what seems to be, a regular basis. There have been so many wonderful little things that I may even forget to list them. I Praise God which each and every one of these.
Lets start with today. I had my annual MRI to check progression on my MS...Absolutely no change in my MRI at all! WOO HOO! We have been down to 1 car for months now. Although it has been an inconvenience it certainly hasn't been impossible. Our plan was to buy a used car mid November early December. Things were on track financially but as the time nears and I'm looking here and there for a car within our budget that's reliable I began thinking, "hmmm are we really going to be able to get something safe and reliable for the amount of money we have to spend?" Well, a gentleman we know approached TJ and told him he noticed he didn't have his car...then he went on to say that he just took his mother-in-laws car off the road. He asked TJ if he would be interested in it. He told TJ that he wanted to offer it to him first before he put it up for sale. Turns out the car is in our price range, it's an older model Chevy, 2001, BUT it only has 24,000 miles on. Isn't that crazy!! We are going to look at it this week and we are thrilled and beyond thankful that he thought of TJ first and approached him. Can I get an AMEN?!?
I was concerned about Justin's transition into middle school...as any mother would be. What made my concern greater was that he was going into a school he wanted nothing to do with. He so badly wanted to get into the same school Joe attends. The first 2-3 weeks was a struggle, he was not happy about the school, he hated the uniform, was up for hours doing excessive amounts of homework, etc. Now that the first 9 weeks have passed his grades are excellent, he is making friends, absolutely loves his teachers and his school. I asked him tonight to rate his school experience from 1 to 10, 10 being the highest. He responded, "Hmmmm, lets see, I give it a 9.9999999 aw heck, it's a 10!" Thank you God for that to!
Lets see...what else? Well our air broke and was out all summer. Heck, who has 5 grand sitting around to handover to get it fixed? Not us! AND after taking Dave Ramsey's Financial Peace class we are not about to charge things when we can make some temporary, much less expensive, "fixes". In this case, someone was kind enough to lend us a window unit that we put in one room and we purchased another unit for under $200; along with some fans and no blankets we were able to get through the summer comfortably. When TJ's car bit the dust we started driving to work together and sacrificing some of our extra curricular activities so whoever needed transportation most received it. There are other things regarding our faith, finances, our boys and our careers that are all contributing to our joy and excitement. Our blessings have been coming in all shapes and sizes, big and small. I am most grateful that we all are able to recognize them and thank God for the work he is doing in our lives through our friends, family, and co-workers.
Don't get me wrong, with all these blessings there are negatives; some things aren't going the way we want them to but we are so accepting of that...it's clearly because it's either not to be or not the right time. I believe a part of all this is reward for our patience, diligence, and our ability to now put our worries in God's hands.
With sharing this...It makes me want to start blogging again. I miss it...I miss sharing and the therapeutic side of it for me. As for the blog name...I just can't bring myself to change it. So, although this wide load has put on her half of what she lost, she will keep the blog name and hold onto to it with the hopes that it will live up to it's name once again.
Thursday, March 28, 2013
Looking Forward to Chapter 4...
I was talking to a friend today, we were sharing how, even at our age, life is still teaching us some very tough lessons. Too often there are others who have their own agenda and they are more then willing to be deceptive and take advantage of those who trust and believe in them. It doesn't seem to matter how many are saddened or disappointed by events that take place, they are satisfied as long as they accomplish what they set out to do.
She told me about a poem so I googled it, read it and was able to easily relate to it....
I walk down the street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I fall in.
I am lost…I am helpless.
It isn’t my fault.
It takes forever to find a way out.
I walk down the street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I pretend that I don’t see it.
I fall in again.
I can’t believe I am in this same place.
But, it isn’t my fault.
It still takes a long time to get out.
I walk down the same street.
There is a deep whole in the sidewalk.
I see it is there.
I still fall in…it’s a habit…but,
My eyes are open
I know where I am
It is my fault.
I get out immediately,
I walk down the same street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I walk around it.
I walk down another street
This last experience closed at Chapter 3. Almost a week later I was able to connect all the dots and come to a conclusion that others were able to come to before me. With that, I see the mistakes I made and recognized how I was mislead. Now knowing where my faults are in all this, I "get out", I let go so I don't cause any more pain, I accept my loss, and place all of this in God's hands with intentions to move on with peace of mind.
She told me about a poem so I googled it, read it and was able to easily relate to it....
There Is a Hole in My Sidewalk
Autobiography in Five Short Chapters
By Portia Nelson
Autobiography in Five Short Chapters
By Portia Nelson
Chapter One
I walk down the street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I fall in.
I am lost…I am helpless.
It isn’t my fault.
It takes forever to find a way out.
Chapter Two
I walk down the street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I pretend that I don’t see it.
I fall in again.
I can’t believe I am in this same place.
But, it isn’t my fault.
It still takes a long time to get out.
Chapter Three
I walk down the same street.
There is a deep whole in the sidewalk.
I see it is there.
I still fall in…it’s a habit…but,
My eyes are open
I know where I am
It is my fault.
I get out immediately,
Chapter Four
I walk down the same street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I walk around it.
Chapter Five
I walk down another street
This last experience closed at Chapter 3. Almost a week later I was able to connect all the dots and come to a conclusion that others were able to come to before me. With that, I see the mistakes I made and recognized how I was mislead. Now knowing where my faults are in all this, I "get out", I let go so I don't cause any more pain, I accept my loss, and place all of this in God's hands with intentions to move on with peace of mind.
Saturday, March 23, 2013
"All that is required for evil to prevail is for good men to do nothing."
When evil prevails there will be sadness, disappointment and confusion. With time and patience the smoke will slowly begin to clear and glimpses of hope will appear to reassure us that eventually things will be fine.
Saturday, March 16, 2013
Nick had tech group first thing this morning. TJ and I dropped him off then did some food shopping and hit up Goodwill for some accessories for Joe's costume for his next performance. We got home and I made red velvet pancakes for Joe and Justin and a bacon grilled cheese for TJ. I did some cleaning then friends of ours stopped over to drop something off. We talked and laughed, and laughed, for a little while...that time went too quick...then they left.We ran out the door to head to Summerville for Joe and Justin;s "graduation" from the Kidfit program...what fun! I am so proud of them for participating and even more proud that they signed up for another session. I walked into the room of people singing happy birthday to me and I was given chocolate covered strawberries. What a great surprise...thanks Nicole! They were yummy! After the kids worked out we headed our with the group to get frozen yogurt and spend time with some great new friends.
Pretty good side plank Justin! I'm so proud of you!
When we got home I opened the mail to find an invitation to some facial plastic surgery place. Wow...I had to laugh. Of all things to come in the mail on my birthday. Tj then sat me down on the couch and put on a Matchbox Twenty concert for me that he DVR'd. He tried so hard to figure how we could go to the actual concert but there was no way around it. After that we had a nice dinner and a bright cake made by all my boys, and we are now relaxing and just watching TV.
That cake does say "Happy Bday Mom" It was Joe's first time piping haha
I am amazed at all the birthday wishes received on Facebook and by phone, text and email. I have undoubtedly been blessed by an Amazing God with the most amazing people he's ever created.
Sunday, March 10, 2013
Peace...
There was much peace in my day and mind today. Although yesterday was a tough day, by the time we got home late last night things were much better. Yes, I did have 2 drinks that relaxed me and pushed tension out of the way.
I slept GREAT last night for the first time in a long time. I got 8 hours of solid sleep...exactly what I needed. I got out of bed, made breakfast for my little guys while my husband slept in; once he woke up we went to the automotive store so they could hook up my car and get the codes to determine why the engine light is on. It does need some work but nothing is needed immediately and it shouldn't be too expensive...thank you God!
A friend of mine and I then headed to the hospital to visit our neighbor. We had such a nice visit; we were there for a few hours engaged in great conversation. After that we grabbed something quick to eat then headed home.
It was really a great Sunday..I'm looking forward to a good, positive and peaceful week.
I slept GREAT last night for the first time in a long time. I got 8 hours of solid sleep...exactly what I needed. I got out of bed, made breakfast for my little guys while my husband slept in; once he woke up we went to the automotive store so they could hook up my car and get the codes to determine why the engine light is on. It does need some work but nothing is needed immediately and it shouldn't be too expensive...thank you God!
A friend of mine and I then headed to the hospital to visit our neighbor. We had such a nice visit; we were there for a few hours engaged in great conversation. After that we grabbed something quick to eat then headed home.
It was really a great Sunday..I'm looking forward to a good, positive and peaceful week.
Saturday, March 9, 2013
In Search of...Strength...from God
I have been working hard had staying focused mentally and emotionally. Much has been going on but all should be settled shortly. I'm proud of myself for holding me together. I did break done earlier in the car with my husband. We have an event to go to later on; I told him I had no idea what I was going to wear. I told him I can always go into the side of my closet where I saved my "fat" clothes, with that tears started to pour down my face. Later on I was outside talking to a friend and the damn tears started again when we started talking about dieting and working out. I am at the point I swore I would never be at again.
With this, my car has been acting up, my check engine light went on then started flashing. We are so low on money right now that I wouldn't even know what to do if there is a serious problem. I can't even think straight enough to know what I'm going to do with my car. We checked fluids, filled everything up, and will check it in the morning. Things seem to be breaking, everything, even the dogs bowl broke today haha.
With all this going in and more, we groomed the dogs today. The littlest one was in the sink getting a bath, the medium dog was getting shaved by my husband, and the big one got a good trimming. Tomorrow I'm thinking baths for the medium and big one then we should be good.
I just need to hang in there...stay strong, keep praying and everything will fall into place.
With this, my car has been acting up, my check engine light went on then started flashing. We are so low on money right now that I wouldn't even know what to do if there is a serious problem. I can't even think straight enough to know what I'm going to do with my car. We checked fluids, filled everything up, and will check it in the morning. Things seem to be breaking, everything, even the dogs bowl broke today haha.
With all this going in and more, we groomed the dogs today. The littlest one was in the sink getting a bath, the medium dog was getting shaved by my husband, and the big one got a good trimming. Tomorrow I'm thinking baths for the medium and big one then we should be good.
I just need to hang in there...stay strong, keep praying and everything will fall into place.
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