Throughout the last few weeks I felt myself connecting and disconnecting with God.  Not that I ever stopped believing in Him, I was so distracted and wrapped up in myself that I would forget to acknowledge and pray to Him…yet there were so many reminders that he was there.

About 3 weeks ago I was in the waiting room of a doctor’s off and a man, named Michael, began to speak to me.  He was clearly disabled and for some reason he started to explain to me why.  Michael was lying in his car and a container was accidently dropped from a crane on him.  Had he been sitting upright in the car he would have been dead, according to the doctors.  He told me while he was in the hospital he died and went to heaven.  He was greeted by St Paul.  After his experience he became a believer.  He goes to different churches and shares his experience.  I’ve heard of people who have had these experiences but never actually met someone who did.

The next day I was driving and a friend sent me a text.  She told me about a man who approached her husband and said to him “your family is going to be okay and so is your little girl.”  Does that sound odd…no, not really.  But considering this guy knows nothing about them…oh and did I forget to mention he also said, “God told me I needed to tell you.”  Isn’t that amazingly freaky yet so comforting?  Their little girl has been having stomach problems for some time now.

Then, just last week 4 of my prayers were answered within hours of each other.  I have a friend who has been fighting for custody of her grandchild since May.  What a rollercoaster ride!  I prayed frequently that she gain custody of this child.  It finally happened and she was reunited with her brother and sister.

Soon after that I received a phone call that my mom was doing so much better and would be released over the weekend.  What a relief this was.  It was just about a week before that they said she would be in the hospital for a while.  She I home now, going to dialysis, and taking good care of herself, hopefully.

Ever been stuck at a crossroad and your just not sure which way to go?  I have been there for a little while now.  I really felt the need to have a conversation with someone but they didn’t have the time to talk.  We emailed a little bit about the situation but that can take too long and it was something that was really weighing heavy on my mind.  I prayed to God to guide me and give me some clarity so I would know what the best thing to do would be.  When I saw him the conversation just started.  I thought it was a good conversation and I feel as though things are okay for now. 

Final prayer answered that day was for an amazingly strong lady who is going through treatment for cancer.  She found an area on her leg that they were concerned about.  She had a doctor’s appointment earlier that day.  When I went to her office to see how she was doing, she told me that everything was fine.

I have never experienced, or at least have been aware of, Gods presence and reassurance that everything will be ok, that I will be ok.  It was all these things, including the conversation I had that yanked me out of that rut I was in.  I’m feeling much better and more focused.    My eating is under control as far as binging goes, now back to better food choices, prepping, and taking care of myself…not feeling sorry or sad about things.

I want to learn…wait let me rephrase that…I need to pass my worries over to God.  I hold on to them so tightly and literally torture myself about things.  I end up in the victim role.  I don’t want to do this anymore, it’s so exhausting.  I don’t want to waste any more time.  I want to create peace, consistency, and happiness.  It’s a while since someone I knew shared this passage to me.  It was one of those things that were shared at the perfect time…I always go back to this for comfort.

Matthew 6:25-34

Do Not Worry

    ²⁵ “Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothes? ²⁶ Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? ²⁷ Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life?

²⁸ “And why do you worry about clothes? See how the flowers of the field grow. They do not labor or spin. ²⁹ Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these. ³⁰ If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, will he not much more clothe you—you of little faith? ³¹ So do not worry, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ ³² For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. ³³ But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. ³⁴ Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.