The start of today went well.  Lots of lose end were tied up...a couple if things that had me stressed out also came to a close.  What a relief!  As the day went on things became more stressful.  It ended with upsetting news at work…things at work have been very emotional for me lately.  I am trying so hard to hold it together, which has worked while in the office…but it all fell apart tonight.

Before my workouts I’ve been praying hard to stay focused and push myself through them.  It’s been working well.  I prayed tonight for the same and I did ok for the first part of the workout.  It was exhausting but a great workout.  I was one of the last to finish so I was able to rest just a few minutes before the 2^nd part of the workout.

We walked out to the street so I figured we would be doing some running…which I was ok with.  We ended up being broken up into 2 teams to do an Indian Run and the teams that finished last would have to do 25 burpees.  I instantly went into meltdown mode.  Teresa, who was on my team got in my face and told me I could do this…I was literally on the verge of tears.  I was holding them back with all my might.  I’m so disappointed in myself for my reaction.  It was so wrong.  I’m only disappointed in my running because I defeated MYSELF before I even started and was ready to quit on my team.  I’m feeling pretty ashamed of myself.

I left just a few minutes after I did my burpees, got in my car and lost it.  I just cried like a baby.  I had a tough time pulling myself together.  Once I got home I had some composure, went in the house, and sat at the kitchen table to catch my breath.  I finally told TJ and he gave me a pretty good talking to than told me I needed to stop acting like Justin (our 9 year). 

Well TJ has lost about 15lbs in 2 weeks on his diet.  His discipline and determination is amazing me. The results are spectacular and he’s feeling the difference!  I’m so excited for him and very proud!  He has been cooking great food and is encouraging me to stay on track J  I’m not sure if I can even express how exciting this is for me.

At the end of a stressful day, my workout was good, my eating was great.  I owe a few big apologies and a couple of huge thank yous for my team to who didn’t give up on me.